April 13, 2008

Embracing I am a sex toy

One of the great things my journey in life with being a slave has brought me was great peace and enjoyment with my sexual desires and drive. It is one of those endless debates of people in terms of how much this is about sex. I have always found that hilarious as when dealing with power exchange it generally consumes most things about a couple and sex is a big one for most.

The answer is it is solely based on the people involved and their sex drives. People with high sex drives are going to highlight it their relationships and people with low or no sex drives are of course going to minimalize it. I was very fortunate in my journey in sex to learn early on not to be scared or confused because I just happen to have a high sex drive.

We love to muck up sex in a relationship

Now granted I tend to be way more analytical then emotional when observing human behavior, probably the byproduct of being raised by a medical doctor and a doctor of sociology for parents. Add this to my biggest pet peeves, blatant hypocrisy, my culture and having a strong submissive personality has always had my thoughts about how most people seem to make sex so complicated and drama ridden.

For example talk to any person and they will take pride and want people to know them very separately as good at their profession, being a parent, a spouse, a friend and maybe a hobby or two. All these things being allowed to be thought of separately, but then so many people, especially us women, separate them in a sexual way is not acceptable unless of course they are in the mood. The bizarre requirement of your opposite must communicate somehow magically that when thinking about you in a sexual way they are at the same time not only thinking of you that way. I have never understood this. We separate ourselves but then often hate if others do it to us. Well we are parents, spouses, friends, and our profession everyday separately and that includes being a sex object as well.

One of the draws to power exchange relationship

It the potential of a total power exchange relationship to simplify and embrace our sexuality that was a major draw for me. I compare it often to what I see in regular relationships as an opposite way to get to the core of things but in a faster less stressful way.

What I mean by this is most of us just do not want to only be a sex object or even mainly. In regular relationships this is something active in the minds of many people and they need reassuring or worse uses some concept of “normal” to feel their other is not just with them for sex. But in power exchange relationships the giving of your body to your owner for them to indulge sexually to their hearts content actually you can find out quickly if that is all they think of you as.

So to me in good relationships in any dynamic the finish line of accepting our other thinks more of us then just a sex object is the same but for me the power exchange way just is a faster and more direct approach.

Embracing our sexual being as slaves

I can only speak for myself, and in terms of a sex drive I have a very high one, but part of a good sex life and a good relationship if both people have high sex drives is coming to grips and accepting you are a sexual object and that is no better or worse then being a good spouse, friend or nurse.

If your owner has a high sex drive/sexuality you will more often then not be required to have your sexuality nearly always on or right near the surface. As a slave you will most likely be often dressed or undressed to please and tease and to have the taste of cock and cum in your mouth permanently from how often it will be used that way among just the few of the things and feelings.

This personally makes me happy. It is both a show of how my Master loves me to use me this way but enjoyable for me selfishly because I love sex and was extremely fortunate to accept and embrace my sexual being by the exposure, experiences and teachings of the people I have met along my path.

My journey of accepting I am part sex toy

I was blessed to start with a Mom who was open minded. Not to say I was not raised in a typical home because I was. Sex was not discussed actively but my Mom was proactive in discussing it and not promoting it as bad or any other negative way. From my first sexual experience I decided this sex thing was all good and I was never to answer I rather shop then fuck in some sex survey for the rest of my life.

When I was sixteen I had two major sexual events occur that shaped my path and I am not sure without them happening I would be a slave or this happy and content in my life. The first event was getting caught having sex with a girlfriend of mine to which the whole world within hours was to know. Outside of the pain of public embarrassment and hurting my family the other affect was now being out about my bisexuality to the world.

This lead to the big event and that was a woman who sexually completely objectified and dominated me. After it happen my mind kept thinking that I was suppose to hate what was done and be mad about it. But my body was on fire sexually for days afterwards and my mind could only think of the experience and thoughts of future things that could be similar that I swear I must have set some masturbation record.

After that I basically spent the next four plus years trying to live out similar situations until the greatest event to determine my future life happen and that was to meet a couple who would introduce me into the concept of total power exchange, hedonism and to become a slave as the way I was meant to live.

With them and in particular my Mistress I learned to not separate sex from other aspects of me or feel that it was wrong to want it a lot but was encouraged and trained to embrace it and that I can be and am a sex object. But all the while being shown this can live easily with all other aspects of my life. That you can be sexual and do normal things at the same time like for example, study while naked and with dildos in my ass and pussy. That a lot of sex did not distract or cause neglect in other areas if you plan it right and maybe most importantly I could be loved and thought of as a complete person while being a pleasure toy dominate the relationship aspect.

Sometimes I sometimes get emotional just thinking how lucky I was to be found by them and what I might have missed in my life.

I am proud of what I am

I am a good daughter, aunt, nurse, friend and other things. I am also proud and try my best to be a good partner and slave for my Master. Plus with all these things I am also proud that I accept and embrace that I am my Master’s fuck toy, slut, cheap whore, cum receptacle and my Master’s favorite nickname for me, holes.

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