About me and this blog

****Warning this is probably a boring self indulgent post. I just wanted to write this to have it on record. I will return to a regular blog post in the next post.****

I had written a fairly extensive description of me and my intentions with this blog before I created it then butchered it to fit in the space limitation of the section about me. I thought I should write something to explain some things about me and reasons for this blog.

Why am I doing this?

By far the biggest reason is simply because it gives me an avenue to reflect on my own thoughts and feelings for living in a total power exchange relationship as a slave. Normally I do this on a message board but have started to find that limiting. This is especially true when it comes to a total power exchange relationship which is in the vast minority and often gets distorted by cyber theorists and attacked by people in the life but not into it at a TPE level.

I have a brain that just races even if I try to put it in neutral. This has caused me a lot of stress and anxiety over the years. One of the things, besides being owned and meditation, that greatly helps my mind slow down is writing. Since English was my second language for a long time and even now is co number one I have always had to slow myself down when writing so it comes out as English. Also, writing something that another person is going to read requires thoughts to be presented in a clear and organized manner which helps my brain deal with things as well.

For me to think or believe this is not the major point is hubris on a grand scale. I would love for other people to read my words and get something out of them from the smallest thing to something major but I have no delusions of those lofty expectations actually happening or trying to make that happen.

What types of blogs I like and dislike

I enjoy reading blogs but have found very few that I particularly respond to. Now I will be the first to admit that if you met me in real life that I am not the easiest person to have a casual conversation with. I am not much for small talk and giving play by play details of my daily life. I am Asian and raised in Eastern culture and I follow the common way of family, a few close friends and rest of the world. Generally only my family and a couple of friends get the inner workings of my life and emotions.

I find many blogs from other women for me personally to either be too full of romantic prose of the way this life works for them as they reconcile something that happens to them specifically to some grand romantic theory or mostly detail play by play of every high and low in their life. Certainly nothing wrong with that but not something I am necessarily into.

I find other blogs on D/s and BDSM to be more about self promotion in terms of my life validates my theories, trying to sell toys and promoting events they attend or have some ownership in.

Most of the blogs I have read and enjoyed have to do with Domestic Discipline as I find them to be on the same page with me on everything but the domination and kink aspects that M/s provides with me. Obviously though Domestic Discipline is not M/s.

Most of the blogs I see in M/s that are more theory based and posts about the life are male based. Nothing wrong with that but they can often be too cyber theorist type views and often fail to get how a female and/or slave thinks about these things.

What I hope to project in my blog

What I am hoping to write in my blog is a realistic view of the aspects that make up Master/slave relationships as a female and a slave through my years of experience living the dynamic and all the time spent in local communities and on message boards. I believe I can offer a middle ground of sorts that helps bridge the gap from the flowery romantic prose and cyber theorist’s manifestos to the detail of day to day life type blog.

I also have been often told by women and dominants that I tend to focus too much on sex, rules, rituals and play. I do know I focus on them a lot but it is for a reason. It will also be a focus of this blog as I feel that from the dominant side it is often not understood just how important these aspects are to an M/s relationship from a slave’s perspective and how these things intertwine into all aspects of life with us. I also believe as women we often tend to downplay the importance of sexuality in our lives and especially how it interacts within a power exchange relationship. I believe if we can be frank about everything else then we should be frank about sex. I think it is way too mystified and bent too one sided toward one way thoughts and not the multiple aspects it truly is.

Another big theme you will see in my blog is the ever ongoing education of dominants that submission and domination are two different things and people who identify as slaves are not looking for someone just to be submissive to but are looking to be dominated.

Why are these issues near and dear to my heart

There are three reasons that I focus on the rules, rituals, kinks and sex and understanding domination is different and vitally important to a slave.

1) In some ways I am very lucky that when I stumbled into the power exchange way of life I was already a near complete package. I came out of the womb standard equipped with a strong submissive personality that without any prodding makes me put love ones needs and desires over mine.

I also grew up in eastern culture in a very loving family and also witnessed many other loving families. This means I grew up in very traditional role dynamic. I also saw Western relationships. In the end I saw good and bad in relationships from both cultures but a common thread in them emerged, good relationships the people want to make their other happy and in bad relationships the person just wants to make themselves happy.

All this to say I embrace traditional roles in a relationship naturally very much and believe the best way to make a man happy is to fuss over and spoil him. So in other words me blogging about these aspects does not really enter my mind that much as they are just so second nature.

2) I have issues with how Master/slave relationships are promoted. In my opinion, and I realize this borders on the ill advised gross generalization, this life is mostly discussed on one aspect and that is a slaves obedience. I find this very distorting of how the life is and hurts people trying to live this type of relationship.

The level of obedience desired in a total power exchange relationship is not natural but takes an active effort from both people. Being submissive and being submissive in a slave role is two completely different things. Being submissive means wanting to make your other happy and doing things for them before yourself but on your terms. Being a slave is doing them on our Masters terms. To get to the latter is where the separate component of domination comes in and this is often just not discussed.

3) I must freely admit that my fetish is power exercised over me on an intense level. The physical and mental manifestations of the out of the ordinary day to day life activities are the extra spice in my life. So, the topic and everything in this part is something I am more prone to think about and want to write about.

Summary

I thank you for coming to my blog and hope you have read something that made your click on one of my pages worth your time. I hope you will come back and visit. If you have enjoyed my post on this blog about power exchange please click on the link Short Topics and Random Musings http://asianslaverandommusings.blogspot.com for more things I have written. They are shorter for the most part and the topics are not all about power exchange.

My goal is to update my blog with new postings most days between the two blogs. Obviously I will not always do that, but I am consciously trying to at least do a minimum of 2-3 posts on the main blog a week and 2-4 posts on the other blog and to the FAQ section.

Thank you again for clicking on my blog!