It’s the Journey

“If you live the sacred and despise the ordinary,
you are still bobbing in the ocean of delusion. “ - Zen Master Lin-Chi

This is one of my favorite quotes. It popped into my head a couple of days ago as I was cleaning the bulk of our home. Here I was back to the routine of my life after many weeks of big highs and a big low but especially thinking of the big highs. I then realized there is nothing now in the moment that my Master and I have a specific time frame or deadline to make that is important, which for me it has been a very long time since that has happen.

So here I was dusting and vacuuming, feeling no pain, no marks on my body healing, tired from the midst of four straight shifts at work and missing my Master as he was away on business. I realized this was my life as much as anything. As much as directly serving my Master for what ever he wishes. As much as just ordinary couple time and all other things we often love about life. So this quote popped into my head because this is what it has always meant to me. That we must be content and love the ordinary part of our life just as much as we like or pursue special moments.

To me this has merit in two things when thinking about the power exchange life.

Live for the routine and treasure the special moments

There is a link I have in my favorites here that talks about a slave getting her collar. Relax, I do not assign homework! What she wrote was that by the time they got the collar and actually put it on her it was quite anti-climatic. The reason being was her life with him was already what it was going to be and that was great. She was embracing her actual life and not just dealing with it until the next big exciting moment.

Whenever I am asked or read a question like “When do you know” in things like to move in with your Master, go 24/7, go TPE and things like that my response is always very consistent. I like to communicate that you know when you are ready when it feels like it is just another step in your life and doing it feels like it is something obvious to do.

To chase highs in our life is to guarantee failure as highs can never last and as the quote suggest cause delusions. It is not because your weekends of kink and sex with your new partner are always awesome that makes one ready for the next step. It is spending time with them during a week where you work, do chores and just more regular life forced into couple world. If that feels good and natural just like any power exchange stuff then you know you are in something for what it is and not chasing highs.

Enjoy our life for what it is and not what we want it to be.

We live as ordinary people in an average way for where we live and who we see.

I just lost a dear relative, got married, had to kiss up at work from all the time I have missed, and many other things that every human being does. We love to project this life as being special or better then others but in the end this life is ordinary but just fits us best.


So to a slave who thinks a collaring ceremony is exponentially better then even a wedding but it is really no different then any other ritual where a couple professes their love and intended commitment in front of family and friends. It is just that slave’s personal way to express it. We do not love more, communicate better and are more blissful than any other couple because we live a power exchange life. We just love more, communicate better and feel more blissful for us because it is our best way to feel these things. A Master is not of higher character or more responsible then an ordinary man just because nor is a slave more unselfish then any other person just because they are a slave.

So as I sit here typing this believe I am in the best place in my life that I have ever been. I think I am lucky but not special. I think I have worked hard to get here but I have not leaped by others who are not in as good of a place in their life. I do know and will try that even as I type this it is really not a destination but merely a moment in time. That my life is constant moments and how I do handle the ordinary and feel about them is just as important as dealing and feeling about the not so ordinary happens to me that all of us love to experience.